he puts the penis in happiness.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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