If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Buhtt sex?
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize