Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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