I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
