Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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