What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
