Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize