How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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