Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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