I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
last night I used snow as a chaser
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize