This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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