told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
