overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
