so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
