I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
