We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
