would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
