Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
