hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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