dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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