There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Can I color on your dick again?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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