i think my mom watched the whole time
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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