Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
