i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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