I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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