dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
