I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
