When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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