how can u be prego again
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
