You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize