And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize