I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Houston, we have a blender
Mom said you looked used
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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