Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
then he tried to convert me to islam
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize