Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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