You just made me feel so damn special
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
