i think my mom watched the whole time
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
