Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
