I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
