Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
