forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You need a sexual gate keeper
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Randomize