You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
