Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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