i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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