I look better un-naked...
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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