She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
