I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
