Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
There's always time for handjobs
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
