so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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