i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize