Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
